So, we have made a really big decision for me to leave the workforce, and enter the world of stay-at-home-mom. See my other post (Changes on the Holmes' Sweet Homefront) for details about this journey.
I have been so very nervous about announcing my resignation, for many reasons. Mostly because I feel like I am well regarded in my field, and am working my way up a pretty promising career ladder. So, I’ve been so fretful, wondering how my boss would take the news.
Well, 2 days prior to my scheduled meeting with my boss (which was today), I was driving down the road, and suddenly, for whatever reason, remembered a dream I had had many, many years ago. The dream had left such a strong impression on my heart that I had awakened, feeling absolutely certain it was a word from the Lord. I have always remembered that dream, quite vividly, even though it came so many years ago.
However, in trying to recall the dream a couple of days ago, I was a little sketchy on some of the details, and was strapping my brain, trying to remember what the message was that I had felt from the Lord. I remembered a LOT about the dream, still, but couldn’t get to the core message, buried somewhere in the back of my mind.
So, yesterday, one day prior to my announcement of resignation, I was cleaning out my desk, in nervous anticipation of the impending meeting with my boss today. I got to the bottom drawer, which was embarrassingly FULL of just…well…JUNK. Old junk!! Years and years of junk that I had mindlessly stashed in the useless drawer. In pulling out the items, and going through them, one by one, I found this old tattered green spiral notebook, and when I opened it up, the only thing I found inside was a penciled, edited, scratched out, attempted poetic version of that dream…that word from the Lord I had had so many years ago….the one I had just randomly thought about, while driving in the car the day before.
So, what was the dream, you may ask?
I was walking home, one seemingly normal night. Down my seemingly normal and typical path, when suddenly, I became disoriented in the pitch black darkness of the night. Without warning, I found myself tumbling down a hill, and I landed in the middle of an open field. I wasn’t sure how I’d landed there, but yet I felt self-confident in my ability to find my way home. Then, out of nowhere, came this stranger into my presence. He offered to show me the way home. Fierce in my independence, I assured him that I didn’t need any directions, as I was quite sure I knew where I was headed. But the man quieted me with his presence, and simply said, “Yes, but wouldn’t you like to know a better way?”
Wow! Now, how creative is that?? God not only spoke to me back those many years ago, but spoke to me again, through the same message, these many years later. Reminding me that, while my path may possibly get me to the same final destination, He has a better way!
Upon reading about that dream, the anxiety I felt about submitting my resignation to my boss melted away. And, wouldn’t you know, when I finally got the opportunity to speak with her, she was overjoyed for my opportunity to stay home with my kids, and embraced me in a supportive hug.
Every step along the way, so far, in this journey has pointed to God’s provision and faithfulness!! How blessed we are!!!